Do you speak sexuality?

Floravi teaches you nothing by telling you that good communication is a fundamental element in a relationship. However, we can guide you to have a respectful and profitable discussion with your partner!  A lack of communication or an awkwardness in the face of words can have a negative impact on the relationship and its longevity as well as on self-esteem. Indeed, there is nothing better for the well-being of a couple than to express themselves on the good times and the bad. Don't just complain, make positive comments about how you feel. Express your desires, your preferences, what you like or dislike, your needs and your limits. In short, say aloud what you think quietly so that you are not only happy and fulfilled, but also so that your partner can share your happiness.

Remember, the perfect recipe for healthy communication is created using just two ingredients: speaking up and listening.

Be careful, you have to proceed in a certain way when you want to express your most intimate desires. It's also important to give yourself and your partner time to talk. Don't worry, Floravi is here to offer you some tips to promote a healthy and sexually active life as a couple:

  • Make the time conducive to discussion. Make sure that you or your partner are not tense, stressed, tired or upset for some external reason at the time of the dialogue. Sometimes it may be better to wait for the perfect moment to express your desires, this will allow your partner to be more receptive.

  • Get to the subject gradually. To allow your partner to follow the thoughts that are in your head, approach your ideas gradually. This will avoid rushing, destabilizing or even upsetting the other person involved. It is important to be prepared for the discussion; think about and choose the words you will use wisely since what is clear to you is not necessarily clear to your partner. We also advise you not to mention the aspects that you dislike or that you would like to change. Also remember to say what you like and compliment your partner on what he or she is already doing well.

  • Be attentive to the words of our partner. Take the following four steps to ensure attentive listening: be receptive to the message, analyze it, try to understand it, then react. If you can make your partner feel that you are actively listening to him/her, he/she will definitely be inclined to express himself more and more freely. You will also be able to make people realize that you are not indifferent to the words of the other, that their words are very important to you. Moreover, if there is a very important element in the face of active listening, it is to never interrupt your partner, no matter how much you feel like it. Hold back! Interrupting someone when they are already in their comfort zone will only make them less likely to speak up in the future.

  • Pay attention to his gestures. Sometimes non-verbal language speaks a lot for itself. Avoid making the atmosphere unpleasant; pay close attention to your body's visible reactions. This will help you pay more attention to those gestures that can create negative reactions, such as frowning, crossing your arms, and breaking eye contact.

  • Be honest in your words and in your listening. If you don't express what you really think or feel from the start, you won't be true to yourself. It is important to remain sincere with your partner. If you want to get an intimate accessory, let him know! Who knows? Maybe he or she is already thinking about it! Make sure your partner understands your thoughts and desires. Similarly, tell your partner if you don't understand what he or she is trying to tell you. Be sure to create a dialogue and not a monologue, this interactivity will allow you to avoid future misunderstandings and conflicts.

  • Express your desires using the "I". Use first person to avoid unintended and unwanted confrontations. Indeed, the use of the second person, for example, will have a rather negative connotation, your partner will have the impression that you blame him / her. By speaking in "I", you will have a more intimate approach and everything you say will be seen as a declaration of your feelings.

  • Be attentive to your partner's wants and needs. Even if you are the person who started the discussion about your sexual thoughts in the beginning, nothing prevents your partner from enjoying the moment and expressing what could make him/her sexually happy. This is when it's important to be very open-minded and to focus all of your attention on him/her. If you perceive your partner to be embarrassed to discuss this topic, you can easily help the situation by asking open-ended questions like, "What don't we ever do that would really make you happy?" ". This type of question leads your partner to respond by highlighting one or more choices that will certainly lead to a longer discussion. Also, if your partner doesn't seem to be creative with their answers, try to help them out by asking multiple-choice questions where you can add some spice to the conversation.

 

You are not convinced that communication will undoubtedly further strengthen your relationship as a couple? Here are some benefits of good communication with your partner: 

  • An increase in the level of excitement, seduction and eroticism
  • Better assertiveness to fully embrace your femininity or masculinity
  • Prevention of conflicts and misunderstandings
  • The reduction of stress and anxiety in the face of natural desires
  • Confirmation of your fantasies and those of your partner
  • Complete opening with your partner
  • Strengthening your couple both physically and mentally

Did you know that one in two women dare not express their sexual preferences? For your female sexual health, express yourself! 

 

Some couples may have difficulty communicating and sometimes this requires more assistance from a medical professional. If this is the case, we advise you to consult a sexologist or another professional specialized in this field who can help you sort out the sexual and relational problems related to your couple.

 

Sources :
Huffington Post, Index Santé
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